Is it possible for a wife to submit outwardly to her husband, and yet not have a submitted heart?
Family Counseling Ministries -
When a wife is unresponsive to her husband sexually, she
wounds his spirit and she undermines her marriage relationship in a sixth way.
Many women respond sexually to their husbands only when it is convenient for
them, or when they feel the need for sexual intimacy themselves. They seldom go
out of their way to meet their husbands needs.
When we become physically one in marriage our bodies are no
longer our own.
God speaks pointedly to the sexual aspect of the marriage
relationship in 1 Corinthians 7:3-5,
Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise
also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own
body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have
authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another,
except by agreement for a time that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and
come together again lest Satan tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
When a wife meets her husbands sexual needs as God intends,
she helps to protect him from temptation.
The body of a marriage partner belongs to his or her
spouse. Along with this truth is the balancing principle of Gods command to
Believers to exercise self-control in all things. In a loving, committed
relationship, each marriage partner should fully meet the needs of his or her
partner. According to Gods Word, they should interrupt the regular practice of
sex only by mutual consent and for a short time.
Men and women have very different sexual needs and responses.
Husbands and wives need to understand these differences. Then they learn to
appreciate one anothers uniqueness, rather than feeling offended and
criticizing one other for not feeling the same way about sex as they do.
It is possible for a woman to outwardly submit to her husband,
and yet not have a genuinely submitted heart.
The seventh way that a wife damages a marriage is to fail
to submit biblically to her husband. The writer of Ephesians 5:24 exhorts
Wives ought to be subject to their husbands in everything.
A wife should attempt to accommodate her schedule to her
husbands God-given priorities. A husband cant lead if a wife wont follow. He
is the one who must ultimately give an account to God for his wife and
We read these instructions to wives in 1 Peter 3:5,
This was the secret of the beauty of the women of ancient
times who trusted in God and were submissive to their husbands.
A wife should seek to develop confidence in her husbands
decisions whether they are right or wrong. After she has given thoughtful and
prayerful input into lifes situations as they arise, she should encourage her
husband to assume the position of leadership in making final decisions.
The final way that a wife contributes to the downfall of a
marriage is to maintain bitterness and unforgiveness in her heart toward her
husband, for the offenses that he has committed against her. She must forgive
her husband for all the ways that he has wronged her. She should also determine
ahead of time, to forgive future wounds and offenses that he will commit.
A wife should not feel threatened when her husband
fails. Instead, she should seek to encourage him and to trust God completely.
One of the greatest ways that a wife can minister to her
husband is to encourage him in the midst of his failures. As she acknowledges
Gods sovereign control in her husbands life, she begins to understand that
God uses her husbands failures as teaching tools. She finds peace and comfort
in the knowledge that when she walks in obedience to God, He causes all things
to work together for good.