Encouragement: Safeguarding Unity in Holiness
"Living as a Church"Class 10
In the first chapter of his letter to the Colossians, Paul says something
remarkable:
We proclaim him, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that
we may present everyone perfect in Christ. To this end I labor, struggling
with all his energy, which so powerfully works in me. (Col. 1:28-29)
Did you catch that? Paul says his aim is to present everyone perfect in
Christ. Everyone.
Now that's what you call an audacious goal! Yet we are called to do the same
thing. Hebrews tells us this:
Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is
faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love
and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit
of doing, but let us encourage one anotherand all the more as you see the
Day approaching. (Heb. 10:23-25)
What a massive responsibility. As Christians, and especially as fellow church
members, we are accountable for each other. Together, we are in a life and
death struggle with the world, the flesh, and the devil, and our goal is to
cross the finish line together and present every one of us perfect in
Christ.
Part of that is what we talked about last weekconfronting sin in each other's
lives. But our task is bigger than that. In the passage from Colossians, Paul
doesn't just talk about admonishing. He also speaks of teaching. And in Hebrews,
we are told to consider how we might spur one another on toward love and good
deedsproactively, lovingly, urgently pushing our brothers and sisters ahead
in the life of the kingdom.
Now to be clear, this class isn't intended to make us all busybodies. The
New Testament roundly condemns the idea of being a "meddler"of butting
in where we have no relationship and no permission to speak into a person's
life. But where we do have a relationship or the opportunity to build
one, we are to encourage each other in the Christian life. How we do thathow
we spur one another on toward love and good deedsis the subject of our time
in this class.
I. OUR ENEMIES IN GODLINESS
As members of a Christian church, we are called to encourage each other to
live fruitful lives for the kingdom of God. That is not an easy task, and therefore
we must have our eyes opened to what we're up against. We must know the enemies
that would keep us from growing in godliness. Here are two.
1. Our Struggle is With Our Own Hearts
First and foremost, our enemy is our own heartthe core desires that motivate
our decisions and actions every day. Jeremiah puts it plainly:
The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand
it? (Jer. 17:9)
James, too, points to the desires of the heart as both the cause of temptation
(James 1:14) and of external conflict (James 4:1). When we find our brothers
and sisters in this church making decisions that don't align with their calling
in Christ, we must remember that the ultimate source is not external, but rather
the sinful desires in their hearts.
Why does this matter? Because it has massive implications for how we should
go about encouraging other Christians.
So often, our goal with other Christians is to get them to behave differently.
"If only he wouldn't spend so much time around those people," we
say. Or, "If only she would spend more time volunteering at church." "If
only he would switch into a job that gave him more time with his family."
But behavior is not the ultimate problem, and that understanding should shape
our encouragement to other Christians. Here a few implications of this:
- First, while we can sometimes manage to change a person's behavior,
only God can change the heart. As we involve ourselves in the lives
of others, we must remember that prayer is our best weapon, that guilt
and coercion cannot address the core of these issues, and that our desperation
for God to act merely increases the glory due him. Certainly there may
be times when we work for behavior change (holding someone accountable
for sexual sin, for example) but that is not our ultimate goal. What we
finally want to see changed is the heart.
- Second, we must not compare ourselves to others based on the externals
of our life. A church where people evaluate themselves and take confidence
in their own spiritual actionsthe relative length of their quiet times,
the number of old books they're reading, the number of people they're discipling,
the number of friends they're evangelizingis not a gospel church. It is
a legalistic church. Of course we must look at externals as a sign of spiritual
health, but we must remember that they are the fruits of repentance,
not repentance itself.
- Third, we must take to heart the old phrase, "But for the grace
of God, there go I." It is no accident that immediately after
Paul exhorts us to restore those caught in sin in Galatians 6:1, he warns
us against our own pride and self-reliance. Our hearts are more corrupt
than we can ever know, and capable of more evil than we will ever realize.
- Fourth, we must remember that our goal is not finally to feel happy
and fulfilled. There are many ways to feel happy which never get to
the issues of the heart. Our goal in encouraging others is not merely to
make them feel goodabout themselves, about the world, or about Godbut
to help them know and experience the abiding joy of having their desires
transformed by the Holy Spirit.
Thus the first enemy we face as we struggle to watch over our brothers and
sisters is the deceitfulness of our own hearts.
2. Our Struggle Is With Hollow and Deceptive Philosophies.
A second enemy we face is hollow and deceptive philosophies. Paul writes to
the saints in Colossae in Colossians 2:8,
See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy,
which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather
than on Christ.
We are all philosophers. All the time, we are creating philosophies of meaning
in our lives. What matters? Why do things happen? What's worth living for?
Though we usually know the correct answers to those questions, we are easily
deceived and taken captive by sinful and deceptive philosophies.
We often fool ourselves into believing that we are immune to the world's philosophies,
that we can ignore the message being blared at us day after day. But the world's
ideas of meaning and purpose can gain a foothold in the desires of our hearts
without our even recognizing it.
That leads to what Timothy Lane and Paul Tripp call "gospel gaps" in
our lives. Our guiding philosophy
should rest on the truth of the gospel, but the way we act and think is often
inconsistent with the gospel.
In other words, there are gaps between what we believe and what we do. And
such gaps don't stay empty. All of us operate with a mix of gospel truth and
worldly philosophies in our minds, and part of our goal as Christians is to
identify and root out what is worldly.
Seven Counterfeit Gospels
Being able to recognize gospel counterfeits is incredibly important. In their
book How People Change, Lane and Tripp lay out seven of these counterfeit
gospels. How many of these do you recognize in your own heart?
- Formalism. "I participate in the regular meetings
and ministries of the church, so I feel like my life is under control. I'm
always in church, but it really has little impact on my heart or on how I
live. I may become judgmental and impatient with those who do not have the
same commitment as I do."
- Legalism. "I live by the rulesrules I create for
myself and rules I create for others. I feel good if I can keep my own rules,
and I become arrogant and full of contempt when others don't meet the standards
I set for them. There is no joy in my life because there is no grace to be
celebrated."
- Mysticism. "I am engaged in the incessant pursuit
of an emotional experience with God. I live for the moments when I feel close
to him, and I often struggle with discouragement when I don't feel that way.
I may change churches often, too, looking for one that will give me what
I'm looking for."
- Activism. "I recognize the missional nature of Christianity
and am passionately involved in fixing this broken world. But at the end
of the day, my life is more of a defense of what's right than a joyful pursuit
of Christ."
- Biblicism. "I know my Bible inside and out, but I
do not let it master me. I have reduced the gospel to a mastery of biblical
content and theology, so I am intolerant and critical of those with lesser
knowledge."
- Therapism. "I talk a lot about the hurting people
in our congregation, and how Christ is the only answer for their hurt. Yet
even without realizing it, I have made Christ more Therapist than Savior.
I view hurt as a greater problem than sinand I subtly shift my greatest
need from my moral failure to my unmet needs."
- "Social-ism." "The deep fellowship and
friendships I find at church have become their own idol. The body of Christ
has replaced Christ himself, and the gospel is reduced to a network of fulfilling
Christian relationships."
So that's what we're up against. We are battling the desires of our hearts,
even while we struggle with worldly philosophies that fill the gaps in our
lives. Yet praise God for the hope of the gospel! Because of Christ's death
on the cross and the Holy Spirit's work in our lives, we can know that it is
God who works in us both to will and to act according to his good purpose (Phil.
2:13).
II. THE CONTEXT FOR ENCOURAGEMENT
Before we talk specifically about how we can help our brothers and sisters
in Christ in their struggle for godliness, let's think about the kind of atmosphere
that will facilitate that work. There are two relationship challenges that
we need to watch out forhiding our struggles, and not helping when struggles
appear.
Nothing we say in this class will be of any use if you are not willing to
reveal your struggles to others, and if you are not close enough to others
to know when and how they need help. So here are two good questions to ask
yourself:
- First, are you helping to make this a church that welcomes struggling people?
Or do you only welcome people when they have it all together?
- Second, do you make it a regular habit to share your struggles with others?
Or do you keep everything locked up in your own soul?
So what can we do to create a church context where struggles are honestly
faced and addressed?
How to Help Others
Nothing can make a church more unwelcome to struggling people than a bunch
of church members who work hard to look like they have no problems of their
ownor even worse, who look down on those who admit their struggles.
When someone bears their soul to you, act in humility. Even as you work to
help them hate the sin in their hearts, strive to sympathize with them. It
is only the grace of God that prevents you, too, from stumbling into the same
trap.
One thing that will help is to refrain from offering trite solutions that
make it sound like only a fool would have that problem. "Struggling with
depression? Just read your Bible more; and spend more time outside. Then you'll
feel better."
Don't just try to solve people's problems; listen to them.
Remember that the godly saints of the Bible struggled mightily. Don't pretend
that only "bad Christians" suffer in this life. You'll have half
the Psalms arguing against you.
How to Be Helped
There is nothing godly about handling your struggles alone. That kind of independence
doesn't show strength; it shows pride. Be willing to engage in the "ministry
of dependence." Show that you recognize your dependence on Christ by being
dependent on other people.
On the casual level, that means going deeper than "Fine, thank you" when
people ask how you're doing. Be honest: "I'm doing okay, thanks. It's
been a rough week, but God seems to be teaching me a lot." On a deeper
level, confess sin to your brothers and sisters. Give them the opportunity
to minister to you and to rejoice when God answers your prayers.
Above all, we want to build a church full of honest relationshipsrelationships
that welcome struggling people.
III. HOW TO ENCOURAGE STRUGGLING PEOPLE
The Christians around us are fighting both the flesh and the hollow and deceptive
philosophies around them. We are exhorted to encourage them and to instruct
them. How do we do that?
The answer is that "it depends."
One passage that might be helpful as you seek to encourage others is 1 Thessalonians
5:12-14. Paul writes there:
Now we ask you, brothers, to respect those who work hard among you, who
are over you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard
in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other. And we urge
you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak,
be patient with everyone.
How are we to care for those around us? By warning those who are idle, encouraging
the timid, helping the weak, and being patient with everyone.
When you encounter a struggling brother or sister in Christ, run through those
categories in your mind.
- Is this person idle (or "unruly" as the New American Standard
puts it), and in need of exhortation?
- Is he timid and in need of encouragement?
- Or is he simply weak and in need of someone to help shoulder their burden?
- Whatever the case, how can I have patience with this situation?
As you consider what course of action to take, remember two important things
that will be necessary in every situation:
First, speak Scripture to them. That does not mean simply
throwing a verse at them. It might mean reminding them of a pattern in salvation
history, like the fact that God always proves himself faithful. It might mean
reading through a book that explains and applies Scripture. It might mean studying
a passage of Scripture with them.
Second, "preach" the gospel to them. Whether a
person is idle, timid, or weak, the problem is finally that their understanding
of the gospel is in need of repair. At the root of the problem is a "gospel
gap."
So use Scripture to help your brother or sister realize how their understanding
of the gospel is deficient, and share with them afresh the joyous good news
that "God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we
might become the righteousness of God."
Let's consider now each of the three categories Paul lays out in 1 Thessalonians
5:14.
"Warn Those Who Are Idle."
Suppose you're talking with Sue, who will not remove herself from the path
of temptation. She is very tempted to be in love with the things of this world,
and watching a particular show on television always seems to leave her discontent
with the life God has given her. But she really, really likes the show, and
she has fun talking with friends the next morning after it airs. The two of
you have talked about how this show is playing a destructive roll in her life,
but while she confesses this sin, her life hasn't changed.
What do you do? Where is the gap in Sue's understanding of the gospel? There's
probably at least three gaps. First, there's probably some
idol represented by the show that she believes is more satisfying than God.
Maybe the beautiful people on the show? Maybe her ability to feel like she's
"with it" when talking about the show the next day with her friends.
Explore what those idols might be. That's what she's worshipping.
Second, recognize that that idol is where she's finding her
justification. Is it the idea being beautiful or with beautiful people that
makes her feel justified before the world? Does she feel justified when her
friends regard her as cool or "with it"? Whatever it is that makes
us feel important, good, special, worthy of recognitionthat's the thing we're
using to justifying ourselves. By the same token, that's the thing we're worshiping.
So, is she worshipping Christ, knowing that her justification is bound up entirely in
him? Or is she worshipping the world, wanting the justification and approval
of the world more than anything?
Third, because she's still worshipping some idol and seeking
her justification through that idol, she's failing to repent. She's not fleeing
temptation. The question Paul would put to her is, "We died to sin; how
can we live in it any longer?" (Rom. 6:2). Does Sue understand what repentance
looks like? Is she taking Jesus' words seriously, that "If your hand causes
you to sin, cut it off," (Mark 5:30)? Does she understand that mere regret
is not repentance?
Talk with Sue about the difference between worldly sorrow and godly sorrow.
Show her 2 Corinthians 7:10:
Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret,
but worldly sorrow brings death.
Warn her of the consequences of sin and idolatry in her life. Remind her of
the amazing love and freedom that are hers in Christ!
Or consider Matt. Matt comes to church regularly, but he isn't very involved.
In fact, other than his weekly visits to church, his life isn't much different
from his moral, non-Christian neighbors. If you could listen in on his conversations,
you'd quickly get a feeling for where his passions arehis job, the new house
he bought on the shore, and his boat. Matt may well be a Christian, but he
is worldly, and he is trying to serve two masters.
While there is no explicit sin in his life, Matt certainly has his own version
of the gospel gap. Like Sue, he understands his sin and God's salvation on
an intellectual level, but it he hasn't really internalized what it all means.
Jesus said that if we understand that we've been forgiven much, we will love
much. He also told us that we cannot love both him and the world.
So what do you do?
First, state your concern to Matt about what looks like an
inconsistency of his claim to faith and his love of the world. The apostle
John's words are pretty stark: "Do not love the world or anything in the
world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him" (1
John 2:15) Once again, we have an idol problema worship problem. What does
he really love and worship?
Second, you might be able to help Matt see this by asking
him to consider who is the active god in his life. That is, which
god is guiding his values, ambitions, pleasures, and decisions on an hour to
hour basis through the week? Ask him to consider whether this other god will
be able to mediate for him before the throne of God the Father on Judgment
Day.
Third, warn him of the danger of investing his talents in
things that are passing away. And pray that God would enable to see through
the lies he's believe, that he would understand God's forgiveness, and that
he would thereby be driven to love of the true God.
"Encourage the Timid."
Regarding those who are "timid," think of people who have given
in to sin, who have tried to walk in righteousness but have failed so many
times that they have completely given up. You might see this with sexual sin,
or with someone who finds marriage so difficult that he sees no option but
divorce. These people aren't obstinate; they've just tried to follow Christ
and been exhausted by it. In their words, "It isn't working."
How do we encourage these Christians?
- Make sure they really are "timid," and not simply in need of
a strong warning.
- If they do need encouragement, then remind them of God's promises in Scripture.
1 Corinthians 10:13 is a good place to start: "No temptation has seized
you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you
be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also
provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."
- Recognize that at some level they're being deceived, whether by themselves,
the world, or the devil. Maybe they've been deceived into believing they
cannot change, even though they really want to"John, you're always gonna
have this struggle; you might as well give in." Maybe they've been deceived
into believing they want to change, when really they don't because they still
love their sin more than anything"I want to change
but, then again,
I can't imagine life with out this." Introduce them to Christians
who have seen God provide victory, and who can help diagnose the specific
lies they are believing.
- Find specific truths and promises to counteract the lies they are believing.
Spend time with them. Offer regular, specific accountability.
- Pray earnestly that God would give them faith in his promises, and encourage
them to pray for the same thing.
- In all you do, show them the hope of the gospel. Remind them that we have
received the righteousness of Christ and the Holy Spirit who is our hope
for real change. Remind them also that God has good purposes for them in
even this most demanding trial. He is in control, he is good, and he will
carry onto completion what he has begun in them.
Think, for example, of Joe. Joe is in his late twenties and still trying to
figure out what to do with his life. He works in a dead-end job, doesn't find
himself particularly useful at church, and would like to get married but isn't
anywhere close. In short, he's been struggling for several years with what
God's purpose might be for his life. Joe feels like he's close to giving up,
though he doesn't know what "giving up" would really mean. But it
sounds dramatic anyway. How do you encourage him?
Again, look for the gospel gap. It could be in several places. In a strange
way, he could have fallen into legalism: Having begun with the Spirit, he now
thinks of his goal in terms of human effort. He considers his worth to be directly
related to his productivity (or his lack of productivity), and that has resulted
in despondency.
Remind Joe that his worth before God is grounded in Christ's finished work,
not his own. Share with him the glorious hope that God has given to all those
who are his children.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy
he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of
Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish,
spoil or fadekept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's
power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the
last time. (1 Peter 1:3-5)
"Help the weak."
Who is weak? In a sense, all of us are. But there are some in our midst who
are weak in ways that make them spiritually vulnerable. If the timid are those
who have faith but will not exercise it, the weak are those who cannot exercise
faith without great difficulty.
Max has been diagnosed with clinical depression. He is unable to do the amount
of good that he once could. He struggles mightily with his relationship with
God now that many of the emotions of faith he once counted onwithout ever
realizing itare few and far between. Through work with his pastor, he has
come to recognize some of the spiritual roots of his problem, but his mind
is still susceptible to that downward spiral of depression, and there is a
physical-chemical side of his disease that is hard to escape. He is discouraged
and downhearted in many different ways. Max is weak. How can you help him?
Well, consider how he is weak. He may be weak in faith. His present emotions
feel like they will last forever, so God's promises seem so distant as to appear
non-existent. Help him learn to trust God more than himself.
Or perhaps the help he needs is the constant reminder that there are Christians
in his life who love him, and whose love is rooted in something much more secure
than his own "lovability." Read through Ed Welch's book Depression: A
Stubborn Darkness with him, looking for where there might be gospel gaps
that are at the root of these struggles.
Above all, share with Max the gospel of hope. Help him to see how his sufferings
are producing perseverance, character, and ultimately, hope. Remind him why
he can trust the goodness of God even as he wonders why he is struggling. Remind
him that Jesus is returning and that one day he will see with his
own eyes the great things Jesus was doing through all these present trials.
As a last example, consider those in our church who are frail in their old
age. They are weak in a very physical sense of the word, and yet that physical
weakness can make them weak in many other ways as well. Have they put too much
confidence in their of productivity? In their close friends or spouse? In the
physical pleasures of life?
The loss of those things may well expose gospel gaps in their life. You can
help them by reading Scripture, praying, and using your strength to point them
to the gospel. People sometimes need your faith in order to exercise their
own. Your reading of Scripture, praying, or talking about the gospel may be
just what this saint needs to remember the One in whom they believe.
Encouraging such brothers and sisters may be as simple as providing physical
help so that they can carry out their desires to help others. Mail letters.
Provide transportation to church. Helping someone, even on a very menial level,
can do wonderful spiritual good.
Finally, encourage them with the reward that awaits them in heaven, and let
them encourage you as those who live just footsteps away from eternity. Ask
them to share with you what they have come to love about God, how they have
found him faithful. You will be helped even as you help them. You may never
know how much those conversations keep at bay the temptation to complain against
God for pain, and suffering, and loss.
"Be patient with everyone."
Finally, be patient with everyone. Never condemn, and never justify yourself
by your own relative strength or holiness. Instead, be patient. Be marked by
a patience that is driven by humility; that comes from knowing how patient
your heavenly Father is with you; and that delights to serve your brothers
and sisters because they are reflections of God's character.
IV. CONCLUSION
In conclusion, here's what C. S. Lewis wrote about the love of God:
In awful and surprising truth, we are the objects of his love. You asked
for a loving God; you have one. The great spirit you so lightly invoked,
the "lord of terrible aspect," is present; not a senile benevolence
that drowsily wishes you to be happy in your own way, not the cold philanthropy
of a conscientious magistrate, not the care of the host who feels responsible
for the comfort of his guests, but the consuming fire himself, the Love that
made the worlds, persistent as the artist's love for his work and despotic
as a man's love for a dog, provident and venerable as a father's love for
a child, jealous, inexorable, exacting as love between the sexes . . . It
is certainly a burden of glory not only beyond our deserts but also, except
in rare moments of grace, beyond our desiring.
We love because he first loved us. Our love comes from his and ought to reflect
his. May that persistent, venerable, jealous, inexorable love be ours for this
church. May we labor to present everyone perfect in Christ.
Lane and Tripp,
How People
Change.